MTV
I managed to make it into Amy Carlson Gustafson's roundup of MTV memories, meaning that the Pioneer Press has totally made up for spelling my name wrong earlier.
Far more awesome, however, is the NPR.org retrospective expertly done by the lovely Neda Ulaby, and right there in the first box, discussing Kennedy and the need to heal? Dear pal of F&D Stephen Thompson. I have seen the 7 1/2 Harrowing Minutes With Kennedy footage, and I am here to tell you, it is much funnier than he gives it credit for being in this piece. Including the part where Kennedy "breaks in" while he's pretending to "sleep," sending him into vaudevillian fits of sputtering, the part where he winds up saying to her, "Hey, I'm going for it," and ESPECIALLY the part where he cannot think of the name of a single band while sitting in a room full of CDs and music posters. The Couch Baron likes to explain this moment as, "What are the kids listening to these days? [endless silence] Oh, what AREN'T they listening to?"
As you'll note in the piece, it's his birthday, too. Wooooooo! Put on your party hat!
I've Seen "Blind Justice" And You Haven't
If you check out the MSNBC Fall TV Preview, you'll see that I got to review a few pilots for fall. I liked Jack and Bobby, not so much Blind Justice. If you need me to discuss my feelings about The Mountain, you are silly.
Poker Faces
Okay, I read the Slate piece about the World Series of Poker, and I'm not sure I get the point.
read more »
If you saw Celebrity Poker Showdown on Bravo last night with James Woods, you heard him say that playing poker against rank amateurs is especially challenging, because you don't know what they're going to do, because they do random things that don't make any sense. In the long run, you'll beat them, but in the short run, they'll frustrate you and take your money. And I agree with that -- I used to play pretend-money poker at PokerRoom.com, and eventually, it got boring, and one of Pool Boy (The Poker Fiend)'s arguments was that I was bored because people who aren't playing for real money play stupidly and badly, and it's boring. Which is true, and which is why he always wanted me to play for money. And because I wasn't interested in that, I stopped doing it, for the most part, because . . . well, stupid, bad poker is boring.
And what Woods was saying, it seemed to me, was that when people who don't know what they're doing are put in a position like they are on Celebrity Poker Showdown, where they're playing for charity, it's essentially not real money. They don't really have anything riding on it. They play like the assholes I ran into online, not playing for real money and therefore just sort of testing theories of how to do it. People just behave differently when they don't actually stand to lose anything.
But the Slate piece seems to assume that everyone who came to the World Series of Poker because of Moneymaker completely sucked, and therefore only have a chance of winning because their mere presence drives the role of luck up to such a feverish pitch. And I doubt that they all completely suck. Quite frankly, it's just as easy for me to envision serious sucking from a rich guy who has all the money in the world and buys a seat at that thing because it's fun as it is to envision sucking from a guy who watched Moneymaker on ESPN, spent ten hours a day at one of the online poker games for six months straight, and is now in Vegas. I mean, consider this quote from the Slate piece:
When the field gets bloated, there is less chance that the smartest, wiliest players will win, and it is more likely that the final table will turn into an extended amateur hour. In an NCAA tournament with more than 2,000 teams, the top seed would probably lose on a buzzer beater eventually.
Okay. But there's also an argument to be made that part of what's going on is just democracy -- that poker, like everything else, is less likely to have five guys win every damn thing when you open it up to everybody in the country and make it insanely more popular. In other words, not all of those guys showing up for "amateur hour" suck. I mean, they point out that the guy mentioned in the first paragraph who booted Dan Harrington was an economics and math major. Come on. It's possible that in addition to the field being "bloated," poker actually does favor an economics and math major. It's not like being good with numbers isn't helpful.
Ultimately, I think his thesis -- that competitions are boring if the winners are people you've never seen before -- isn't sound. Everybody plays poker differently, and the reason poker on TV is fun is both that it has a kind of puzzle-ish aspect and that it has a dramatic aspect. My personal opinion is that the guys you're going to see rising up out of the online tournaments are guys who can learn (or are inclined toward) the face-to-face aspect, as opposed to just the numbers game. Playing online is as close to . . . I don't know, "cold" poker as you're going to get. No faces, no nothing. The guys who are just numbers geniuses are going to get trampled by the BS that some of the guys at the World Series are capable of pulling.
But I'm not sure I agree that it's intrinsically boring seeing unknowns beat pros. God knows I would pay good money to watch some no-name whip some of the professionals I've seen on TV. And if you've ever watched World Poker Tour, you know some of the nitwits I'm talking about, HELLMUTH.
« hide more
Lester
I liked Lester Holt. It was a short piece, but he kinda made me laugh, because he was doing the usual stuff about who won, and whether the voting was screwy, and how they booted good singers too early . . . and then he's like, "I don't watch it, because I watched it once, and there was all this bad singing, and I never went back." Which just tickled me, because it was honest and funny.
I did it in a very little studio over in Minneapolis, where I had a makeup lady and everything. She was extremely nice, and made me an instant believer in undereye concealer, which I usually don't wear. My favorite part was when she checked me over (having actually put very little makeup on me, since I was made up already from the regular day), and then she went and looked at me through the camera, and then she said, "Okay, we need to do some more color. You're really pale." Which is true, but just how pale I actually am tends to catch people by surprise. I think it's because my hair is so dark. So of course, we went through a lengthy thing about how it looked "too hot," and then they turned off some lights, and then it was too dark, so they turned some of them back on.
The woman behind the camera was entertaining as well -- she was very good about the whole, "Hi, nice to meet you, run this wire up your shirt" thing. We had to spend quite a bit of time with me parked in that chair, because originally the segment was going to be something like 3:35 or so (my time), and it wound up not being until about twenty minutes later.
But doing the actual interview was . . . not as hard as I expected. Interestingly, it's basically the same skill as arguing in front of judges in an appellate court, which I do in the day job. You just have to (1) know what you're talking about; (2) listen to the questions; and (3) keep talking. There were a couple of times where, when I watched it later, my sentence structure left something to be desired -- I would start off a sentence with a subordinate clause and wind up putting a period at the end of it or what have you. But other than that, I was satisfied, content-wise.
But what WAS that weird thing I was doing with my mouth? I don't do that! I don't pucker up like that! And why do my eyebrows look so uneven, when I know they aren't? This is the experience of watching yourself on TV after the fact, I guess. On balance, I suppose I'd rather be satisfied with what I said and unhappy about the weird faces than satisfied with how I looked and convinced that I sounded like a schmuck.
But it was fun. And considering I had about five hours' notice, it could have been a lot worse.
05:55 AM
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What ARE you talking about?
I'm sorry I missed it, but I'm sure there'll be some commentary on TWoP. Congratulations! That's really cool. And I'm glad Lester Holt was a nice guy--he was an anchor here in Chicago for a long time, so it was a big deal when he left us to go national.
I wish I had gotten to see it, but I don't get MSNBC (and I was at work at the time). I did want to say that if the makeup artist got you believing in undereye concealer, you have to get the Clairins Instant Light Perfecting Touch. I cannot explain to you how much I looooove this stuff, because I get huge dark circles (never get enough sleep) and this makes them vanish. Fabulous!
I'm glad it went well, and I wish I could have seen it. That said, I believe I could have rivaled your TV pucker with my "presentation blinking" I do for some strange reason. You know - the constant blinking that drives people crazy? I do that when I give presentations for some odd reason.
Congrats Miss Alli. I'm sorry I'm just now finding out about it after the fact. A month or so ago I was on Jeopardy and when I watched it after the fact, I was really surprised at the wide array of total-freakshow facial expressions I apparently use all the time. So if you just had a TV pucker you're doing fine. I'm sure you charmed everybody's pants off.
Oh, and visiting and bonding with the makeup guy was just about my favorite part.
« close it
On The Air
In theory, I'm going to be on Lester Holt Live this afternoon, somewhere around 4:30 to 5:00 Eastern, on MSNBC. Talking about American Idol.
So . . . yeah. The girl with dry mouth will be me.
12:54 PM
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That scheduled time seems perilously close to when Mom will be calling for dinner.
I am back at the hotel awaiting the appearance!
Hoorah! Cool appearance!
(Feh, back to documents)
Linda (through TWoP and F&D) will always be my first crush. But I think that I am slowly falling in love with Poolboy.
Well, since I missed it, what *do* you think about Fantasia?
If that was your first tv appearance, it didn't show at all. Very professionally done! Congrats
I am such a colossal imbecile for not seeing this and/or TiVoing it. I would have loved to see you in action, rather than just reading your words and putting my image of you together that way. Dumb, dumb, dumb am I. And do you know why? (Well, actually, for a litany of reasons, including that I apparently think eyelash-curlers are heated.) Because I've been checking out your site regularly ever since you redesigned it and somehow I managed to miss the fact that you'd be on Lester's show.
« close it
Not Vern!
If there's one thing that could tell you that Trading Spaces is over forever and always, it's the fact that Vern is leaving. Without Vern, the only thing I miss about that show given that I never watch it anymore will be gone.
Vern admittedly does the same room over and over again (muted! pretty! lots of squares!), but almost every room he does is one that I would voluntarily put in my house. As opposed to Hildi, with her tendency to not only give you crappy new stuff, but actually destroy the stuff you already have. Or Frank, because I really don't need a giant mural of a donut on the wall of my kitchen.
Oh, Vern. You were my favorite.
07:10 PM
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I actually stopped watching this show during the second season (when they got Paige). It wasn't because of Paige especially, it was because the whole tone of the show seemed to change from trying to do a "nice" room that would please the homeowners, to trying to do a "shocking" room and f*ck what the homeowners think. Just look back on the season one rooms and you'll find that even Hildy was doing some wonderful stuff--before she started getting into the absinthe and went nuts.
That makes me beyond sad. I still watch now and then, and Vern is the only one who is consistently great. But, I think I'll try his new show. Of all the people on that show (including Ty Pennington), he's the one that deserves his own show. But doesn't sound an awful lot like 'In A Fix'?
I love Vern. I have modeled all of the imaginary rooms in my imaginary house in my mind after the rooms Vern has designed. I guess I"ll have to actually buy something from his online store now.
Word to that. I think it completely went over the falls during this recent "competition" mode wherein contestants are competing to have their mortgage paid off. There were all sorts of "challenges" to make things harder, such as ugly paint, etc. Yay, fuschia paint in my yellow room. Or the challenge where they had to obtain a kitchen table wihtout buying it, borrowing it from anyone they knew, or going to any store and begging. So they were out there in the trash. Once couple used a skid (or flat, whatever you want to call it -- you know, those wooden slat things that hardware stores stack bags of mulch on so they're not on the ground). Yes, just what I want my kitchen table to be made out of. The worst wood possible.
Eh, Trading Spaces pretty much died to me as soon as I discovered Changing Rooms. With TS, you had Vern (and maybe Laurie) as the designer you weren't terrified of, whereas on CR there's not one of them that doesn't generally produce rooms that I could love.
I'm actually suprised that it didn't happen sooner. Vern is so much better than the other designers on TS. Plus, TLS destroyed TS with having it on. All. The. Time.
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Trout Ice Cream And Other Horrors
Okay, step out on the limb with me here. Do you watch Iron Chef? I'm not asking if you admit that you watch it. I'm asking if you actually watch it. I don't watch it consistently, but I did find myself oddly fascinated when they came up with this Battle of the Masters thing where Food Network subsidiaries like Bobby Flay and Mario Batali go up against a couple of the original Iron Chefs from the Japanese show.
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The greatest loss, of course, is Chairman Kaga, who manages to look both psychotic and orgasmic whenever he bites that yellow pepper at the beginning of the show. Instead, we have some new guy, who has the unenviable task of trying to fill the shoes of a genuinely weird television personality. You knew he was in over his head when he introduced the "secret ingredient" in the Morimoto/Batali battle. He took a deep breath, revealed a giant water tank, and hollered, "SPINY LOBSTERS!" Watching a guy do that in English, as opposed to subtitled Japanese, really makes for an unsettling experience. You don't have to hear Kaga scream, "GIANT CUCUMBERS!" or whatever, which insulates the viewer somewhat from the underlying creepiness of the ingredient being unveiled.
But what was especially charming about the first installment was that Sakai did exactly what my mother and I always laugh the hardest about in every episode -- he made the theme ingredient into ice cream, come hell or high water. The ingredient that night was trout. So Sakai made fish ice cream, which he served with berries and trout skin cookies, basically. One of the judges said something along the lines of, "The trout in the ice cream is very subtle." Yum. I don't like it when ice cream is too, you know, fishy. I think that displaced the asparagus ice cream as the most appalling ice cream I've ever seen an Iron Chef throw down the gullets of the unsuspecting judges.
Of course, it was slightly disappointing that Bobby Flay wasn't electrocuted like he was last time they did this. (Who knew you shouldn't waddle around in puddles of water that have heavy electrical cords running through them?) When the celebrity chefs aren't injured, there's something missing, I would say. Bring on the amputated thumbs!
Quite honestly, compared to other shows, Iron Chef has a remarkable tendency to turn out food I wouldn't eat even if they paid me, which I guess in the case of the judges, they actually do. Most of the TV chefs make stuff that at least seems edible, but Iron Chef always has a lot of crunchy fish bones and fried banana peels and boiled potato eyes and that sort of thing. I am well aware that this is largely cultural with respect to the Japanese show -- it's just a lot of food I'm not used to. But even with the American version, Flay threw a whole battered fish in to be deep-fried, and . . . no, I do not want to eat an entire fish with the skin on. Maybe I don't like theatrical food.
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Honeslty? The few episodes I've seen in their entirety, have produced nothing that I honestly would eat. And that's including the eel ice cream!
No...I tried to watch once and got utterly squicked out by the "surprise" ingredient which was eel bladder or something equally gross--and that cured me of any curiousity I ever had for that program.
Yes! I've watched it on and off for years. But this new "American" version is no good--it's like the remake of Godzilla with Matthew Broderick. Nothing can beat the original, with somebody rattling off in Japanese for 5 minutes and the English dubbing being something like, "Yes! How true!"
I'm so disturbed by the American Iron Chef in general that the Battle of the Masters had me in cringing awe the whole time. I sometimes think the food they make should be served on Fear Factor. Case in point: Trout Ice Cream. Blech.
I actually enjoyed this new iteration quite a bit. (It has nothing to do with, and nothing in common with, the abortive Shatner monstrosity that was on for about 7 minutes a couple years ago.) Most of the cheese is focused on the new Chairman (whom I find, dare I say, quite hot), and otherwise it's fairly focused on the food, as it should be. I mean, you couldn't ask better than Alton Brown as commentator. Maybe they should just let it go at these 4 hours (plus the behind-the-scenes preview), though, and not spin it into a series.
Me too on the trout ice cream. And most raw fishy-type things as well. I would make a lousy judge on this show; fortunately, they're not likely to ask me.
Like Rinaldo, I am glad that this new Iron Chef America washes the memory of the USA network's version out of my brain. I thought FN did a pretty good job of coming up with a backstory for the new Chairman. After all, anyone is going to be a letdown after Kaga, so they might as well make him completely different.
However, unlike Linda, I think a lot of the food they make looks mighty tasty. Perhaps it's my California upbringing or the influence of my Japanese relatives. I would kill for some Morimoto shabu-shabu with Kobe beef, and don't bother poaching the eggs. Mmm!
I'm with Susanna. I think that a lot of the food looks mighty tasty (although some theme ingredients squick me out completely, like natto).
The fried whole fish is something I've been eating with relish for more than 20 years. When properly done, you can't tell that the fish was fried (no excess grease, in other words), and the flesh is totally tender. Also, flash frying for some reason seems to drive the flavor of herbs and stuff into the fish flesh, which is the closest you are going to get to the effect of marinating fish (unless you are after ceviche).
Count me as the third person who loved that this Iron Chef America helped me recover from that Iron Chef USA crapfest.
First off, Sakai was robbed.
I know, I know, I don't want to eat trout ice cream either, but how can anyone contend that a menu that doesn't include trout fucking ice cream is just as original as one that does, I'll never know. Goldfish! In ice-cream form! Blech, maybe, but certainly original.
And did you see him peeling an apple with a chef's knife? Or taking the top off a raw egg with its tip? The man is a master. He certainly kicks the ass of Bobby "I can't remeber my own menus, so it's a good thing my entire repetoire consists of battering things in blue corn masa and throwing some mango salsa on top" Flay.
Yes, I do watch a little too much food network. Just a little.
P.S. Funniest line, bar none? Alton: "Well, Jim, if I'm not mistaken your jacket there is made out of polyester, so best step back from that grill, 'cause that'll go up like a ball of napalm. "
After football, Iron Chef is absolutely the best show on television. Love the way the Japanese guys always win.
Banzai!
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Well, I'm suitably jealous. I always love being able to beat release dates (like finding a DVD box on the store's shelf 2 weeks before it's officially available, which I've managed a couple of times).
I'm glad you liked [i]Jack and Bobby[/i]; I'll definitely sample it now. Otherwise the title and premise would have caused me to stay far away from it.
Did you get to see any other pilots besides the three you wrote about? A couple new series interest me just because of the ensemble of actors they've assembled (sort of like when [i]West Wing[/i] was brand new). I mean, [i]House[/i] has Hugh Laurie, Omar Epps, and Robert Sean Leonard. And [i]Lost[/i] has Harold Perrineau, Daniel Dae Kim, and Dominic Monaghan.
Of course, the tanking of wonderfully-cast dramas is almost more the rule than the exception.... Any thoughts on those?